I am of course very excited for the first ultrasound. It will be week 8, so it might even show us a heartbeat! I am also scared. What if there is supposed to be a heartbeat and there isn’t…? Mostly I am feeling a little stressed and overwhelmed. I want to be prepared with all of the questions, that means preparing a lot of research, and there is a lot out there. I know I will also need to advocate for myself, and I have struggled to do this in the past. Dr.’s appointments just go too fast. I’ve already left the building by the time I remember to ask some questions!
The pregnancy book I am reading
My awesome neighbor who has a 7 month year old recommended Expecting Better. It has been super awesome. This book is actually exactly what I need. It was written by an health economist. She compiles a list of research reviews and lets the reader know if the rumors around pregnancy are true. She even covers some of the tests they can do in the first ultrasound.
It is fascinating to learn how bogus some of these studies are. For instance, in one of the studies she writes about, they neglected to mention how much cocaine women were doing with their nightly glass of wine! And this is the study apparently a bunch of doctors use to recommend no alcohol for pregnant women. The author says you can have up to 1 to 2 servings of alcohol a week in your first trimester, and then a drink a night for the rest of your pregnancy. My spouse is still too nervous about any alcohol, and that is understandable. This is what pregnant people have been told for a long time.
As for what to eat, I have heard to be careful about undercooked eggs, deli, raw or cured meats, seafood, and sushi. I’m sure I’m forgetting something, baby brain is setting in already. What I have not heard is how important it is to wash your vegetables! These can give you toxoplasmosis, which is as bad as it sounds. According to the author however, undercooked eggs and undercooked meat only present the same risks as they do when you are not pregnant, so only avoid them if you want to avoid food poisoning on top of everything else.
Evidence based birth
The fact that pregnant people, having been told to avoid alcohol for so long, has led doctors to tell them this without looking thoroughly into the studies scares me. I know as a feminist, women are not listened to, and this could certainly be true during pregnancy. I hope this is not the case for my first ultrasound. The fact that evidence based birth exists, is proof that medical professionals sometimes just do things because that is the way they have always done it, not because it is what is best for pregnant people.
My awesome neighbor also showed me this website which has some great information about it. They also have a podcast which I need to listen to more of. Basically, evidence based birth means ongoing gathering of research, and choosing what to do based on it, rather than what the medical profession has always done.
The big one that fascinated me was C-sections. I think this might have been covered in Grey’s Anatomy too, there to advocate for masturbating during labor. I have been to scared for my search history to do research on that one… Anyway…women often talk about the need to stand up during birth, and not being allowed to do so. Some say laying on your back is actually the worst position to be in. If things are not working, if the pregnant person is not going into labor, they will force labor with drugs, if the baby seems to be struggling to come out, instead of switching positions, they move immediately to a c-section. This means the c-section rate has actually gone up!
Words, words, words
The research to be done in the next week to be aware of a lot of this stuff seems insurmountable. I would like to be firing off, “what would you do if I don’t go into labor right away, if I don’t want to do a chemical induced labor is that an option?” I don’t know if I am going to have the strength or the wherewithal in the whirlwind that is a doctor visit to remember to ask these things, or to even know what to ask during my first ultrasound.
I know this is why a lot of people do home births, and I understand this choice. It is not for me. I have heard too many horror stories of people being rushed to the emergency room because something has gone wrong. I would like however, for the medical industry to start understanding the things pregnant people actually need, and start accommodating them as regular practice.
If you have some idea of what to ask at our first ultrasound, please let me know in the comments! Let us know your experiences whether in the hospital or home birth. Were you able to switch positions? Were you told to avoid alcohol, or moderate it? Thank you for your help!